Domestic abuse is like an iceberg, say officers who investigated attempted murder

“To the outside world, Bikash Gurung would seem like the model citizen. He’d served his country, he always appeared polite and respectful,” said Det Sgt Matt Lewis.

But it was behind closed doors, that Gurung became a controlling, coercive, abusive husband. In his eyes, however, he was the man of the house and the leader of his family.

In October last year, Gurung was jailed for 14 years after pleading guilty to attempted murder.

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It was back on 29 December 2016 that he launched a terrifying attack on his wife while she was on the phone to police asking for advice regarding ongoing domestic abuse. He violently attacked her with a sharpened kukri – a traditional Nepalese machete.

He slashed her across the face and neck with such force that he broke her neck and jaw. As she attempted to shield her face, he slashed her hands, severing one of her fingers and causing severe lacerations.

The couple’s young children were upstairs at the time of attack.

When officers arrived at the address near Coate Water, they thought Gurung’s wife was dead due to the life-threatening amount of blood she had lost.

But miraculously, she survived and has returned to her job as a nurse despite the injuries she sustained and from which she still suffers ongoing pain.

It was Det Sgt Troy Smith and Det Matt Lewis who led the investigation and ensured Gurung was given a lengthy prison sentence.

During the investigation, they unearthed a history of controlling and abusive behaviour by Gurung including social media posts of a photo which depicted a man pulling a woman’s head to the side by her hair while holding a kukri to her neck.

“He thought that was funny,” said Det Lewis.

“This was just one of the many examples of controlling and coercive behaviour that we found during our enquiries. We found a listening device that he had set up as well as a tracker he had set up on his wife’s phone so he could keep track on her movements.

“Gurung was full and frank in his interview. He admitted attempting to kill his wife, he didn’t really seem interested in whether or not she was ok when she was taken to hospital, he cared more about what would happen to him.

“He came across as respectful and polite, you’d think he was a reasonable man if you met him in the street. He had two personalities. He had his public face, but when the doors were closed at home he was in control and his wife would do as she was told.”

Like many victims of domestic abuse when interviewed by police, it was the first time Gurung’s wife had fully disclosed the years of physical and mental abuse she had suffered at the hands of her husband.

Det Sgt Smith said: “Domestic abuse is like an iceberg because you’ve got what you know on the surface, but it’s only when you sit down and talk to the victim that you find out what has been going on underneath the surface, often for many years and behind closed doors.”

Det Lewis said: “I remember her saying to me when we interviewed her ‘The only thing I was thinking when he was attacking me was ‘I’ve got to live for my boys’. She put her hands in front of her head to protect her, and the whole time all she was thinking was about her children and what would happen to them if she didn’t make it.”

Det Sgt Smith added: “When you interview victims of domestic abuse for the first time, they are usually really scared about what will happen to them. They are scared about what will happen to their children, where they are going to live, how they are going to survive financially. A lot of agencies encourage victims of domestic abuse to have an exit strategy which can include setting up your own bank account and ensuring you have a small amount of money in there, speaking to a trusted family member or friend about your intentions, packing a small bag with personal belongings in so you can leave quickly if you need to escape.

“Domestic abuse rocks through everything. A lot of people in abusive relationships think they should stay in the relationship for the sake of their children, but just because they are asleep in a different room it doesn’t mean they haven’t been affected. It affects their development and it affects their confidence. Children of abusive relationships are more likely to end up as offenders or victims themselves. They are growing up in an environment of permanent stress and it can have a profound effect on them.”

Gurung was sentenced to 14 years imprisonment in October 2017. He will also serve five years on licence after he is released.

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